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November 4, 2016

Anger is a secondary emotion. It’s primary purpose is to mask the primary emotion experienced at a given time.

Lately, I’ve felt a lot of anger, so I’ve challenged myself, in those moments, to pause and identify what I’m actually feeling. Nine times out of ten the primary emotion is sadness.

Sadness is debilitating. It affects every part of my day. Even happy, joyful moments are tempered when they occur in the midst of sadness.

I often feel like Eeyore. He’s the perfect personification (donkification?) of sadness, right? He never sees the brighter side of the situation. He focuses on the negative, and, as a result, he’s constantly depressed.

So, why try to feel the sadness? I mean, I don’t want to end up depressed, right? Well, that depends on your focus. Are you focused on sinking into a permanent “woe is me” way of interacting with the world, or are you focused on the process of allowing the sadness to run its course?

Sadness can’t be ignored. In fact, it won’t. As long as it is present it will continue to manifest itself. The only way to resolve the sadness is to embrace it. Think about the situation causing the sadness. Feel it. Work through it. Cry. Let it was over you. And then, once it has run its course, things won’t look quite as gloomy. The sun will start to shine, little by little. You’ll find yourself chuckling at a joke, and pretty soon you’ll be enjoying a night out with your friends again.

There is no way around sadness. But when you face it head-on, you’ll realize it’s not quite as bad as you thought it would be.

3 Comments leave one →
  1. Tom permalink
    November 4, 2016 10:35 am

    The term is Assification.

  2. Beth permalink
    November 4, 2016 12:34 pm

    Well said…wisdom learned.

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