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Blah

October 1, 2016

That’s how I feel at my best moments right now. Blah. Just south of neutral.

Grief is a weird thing. Denial, anger, bargaining… right now it’s just “denangining.” I slip seamlessly from one to another, crying one moment and screaming the next. Just ask any of my friends, all of whom will likely need therapy as a result of my grief over the last two and coming who-knows-how-many weeks. A friend even had an Irish coffee at breakfast this morning because I was so depressing.

And by the way, when the frick does that stage of grief begin. Because that just sounds like a peach.

How do you process grief? Particularly the grief caused by a broken relationship. Because I’m at a loss right now.

Me? I tend to sit at Starbucks and do the following:

  • obsess over Facebook
  • check Twitter
  • refresh Instagram 72 times
  • write in my journal
  • try to read something out of the Bible (mostly because that’s the Sunday school answer to any problems that arise)
  • check Facebook again
  • refresh Facebook
  • think “Hey, have I refreshed Facebook lately?”
  • suddenly freak out and call a friend to hang out with

My therapist suggested the book It’s Called a Breakup Because It’s Broken. Meh. I don’t feel like being empowered to move on right now.

Anyway, I probably shouldn’t post this. But, I may still do it. I suppose if you’re reading it that will answer the question for you.

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