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March 23, 2012

I have a really hard time internalizing the idea that God can forgive me.  I often believe that, while His grace is big enough to forgive everyone else in the world, it’s not enough for me.  I know that’s a false statement, but the feeling is still there, and it affects the way I interact with the Father (not the triune God, but specifically the person of the Father).

A couple friends and I have been working our way through Ephesians together, reading through it slowly and intentionally, discussing along the way.  I read through chapter 1 again last week, and there was a line that hit me:

In him we have redemption through is blood, the forgiveness of our trespasses, according to the riches of his grace, which he lavished upon us, in all wisdom and insight…

Lavished… what does that mean, exactly?  I stopped and camped on it for a while.  I looked up the definition:  “expending or bestowing profusely.”  It’s abundant.  More of something than we can handle.  More than we need.

So this week I’ve been trying hard to let that truth settle into my spirit, let it become my reality.  It’s a very conscious thing for me right now, and I have to handle it on a moment-by-moment basis.  I think I’m starting to understand, though, if even just a little bit.

The grace offered by God, through Christ, is enough for everyone… even me.

One Comment leave one →
  1. March 23, 2012 2:20 pm

    I think to a certain extent we all deal with this. I completely feel you when you say He is big enough to forgive everyone else, but have a hard time accepting it yourself. I think the moment we can really grasp that He can forgive, but not only can…does…our lives will be changed forever. Great thoughts!

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